Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
not ubering you a puppy
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize