I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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