marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
