why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
