i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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