i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
