i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
