my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
