You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
