I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
