Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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