Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
