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Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
