If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
