absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
