Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm experimenting with sincerity
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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