Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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