If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
They took my balls.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
