Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
