your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
