you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize