no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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