sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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