I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize