1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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