its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
