Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
