we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
