who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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