Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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