K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
The struggles of a small town man whore
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
