Yo dont text me then not text me
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
