Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
we're so committed to being not committed
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
