..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
