How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
