We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize