I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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