The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
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