Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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