You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize