FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Rumble strips road head = magical
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
