That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I'm just crazy horny about you
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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