Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
