An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize