I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
