So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
PANTIES FOUND
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