Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
