I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
