help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
