Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
